Kayaking a week before diagnosis.
June 9, 2009
Dear family and friends,
I had a mammogram and sonogram Dec 2008 and they saw “something”, but were not sure what, but because of the breast cancer history on my father’s side of the family, I was scheduled for a follow up in June. I was also tested for the breast cancer gene markers, which my aunt and cousin have. The test was negative, I don’t have the markers.
On Wednesday, June 3rd, I had another mammogram and sonogram. They found a small, 5 mm lump on the left side and took a biopsy. Friday morning I was told it was cancer and by my primary care physician. He made an appointment with a surgeon for the next Monday. I also had an MRI Sunday to see if there are additional smaller tumors, they found nothing new.
I did not like the surgeon; I felt I she did not answer most of my questions. She said that most cancer patients don’t listen well — maybe it is hard to hear the news. My insurance company provides case mangers. Tina is willing to answer my questions over and over, until I feel comfortable with the information. I think this will be a big help in the future.
I have two choices, remove everything or have the lump removed. Tests show both are almost equally effective. With a full mastectomy I have a 1% chance of the cancer returning, with a lumpectomy, I have a 3% chance of return. Regardless of my choice, I will have daily sessions of radiation for 33 days and may need chemotherapy. Given the choice, I will keep my breast.
More tests are being done on the biopsy and to determine if chemotherapy is needed. This is an independent treatment from the surgery. It depends on the exact type of cancer which at the moment is unknown.
It is more likely that they will not know some of the answers until after the post-surgery pathology test results. Then they will know if the cancer is spreading to other tissue and if it has moved to my lymph nodes. Certain lymph nodes will be removed during surgery to check for cancer. Additional surgery is possible after those test results are finished, but this is unlikely.
The current test results indicate, I have the “very best kind of breast cancer.” It responds to treatments and seldom returns. My lump is small 5 mm; serious is bigger than 1 cm or twice that size. We just don’t know the entire scope of treatments I need.
Wednesday, June 17th, I am going to a LONG appointment at Mass General Hospital (MGH). It is one of the best hospitals nationwide and their cancer unit is also highly regarded. I am seeing one the best surgeons in Boston. This is a 3-5 hour appointment with examinations by 4 doctors who meet to decide your treatment plan. I was told by my hospital that this is really over kill for my little cancer, but this is my cancer and I am doing what I think is best.
I will have surgery in about three weeks. At the moment, I have the luxury of time. I feel I will have a full understanding of this whole process after the 17th.
Love to all,
Christine
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June 10, 2009
Dear Family,
It is HIGHLY LIKELY I will gain weight. In this family, there is deep underlying theme that your worth is related to your weight. I am absolutely aware of the fact that nobody has every meant to hurt my feelings, but small innocent seeming statements about me gaining or losing weight have upset me most of my adult life. From teaching Weight Watchers, I know that this is the case with many people with weight problems. Again, all of us know our families would never mean to hurt our feelings.
So I am asking that nobody comment on my weight at all. This has upset me so much in the past that the first question I asked the surgeon was if there was anyway I could gain weight.
I will have a prognosis for my future in about in week and half. In a way, this surgery is a test to see what is next.
Thanks for all your prayers and thoughts. I am still struggling with depression and the digestive problems; this new diagnosis is just a bit too much.
Thanks for understanding, love to you all.
Christine
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I want you to know how much I admire you for stating so clearly how you feel about these issues, and through it I understand how much of a struggle it has been over the years.
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My son sent me this shirt from Yellowstone, I wore it to the drive-in movies.
June 18th
Dear family and friends,
I went to Mass General for my second opinion. Wow, what a different experience! This is what they do and they do it right.
The staff was much more friendly and helpful. There is a resource center just for cancer with classes in yoga, Pilates and martial arts along with health related classes discussing nutrition, treatment procedures and side effects. I went to three classes today.
The technology was much better. It was noticeable even at the introductory appointment. The attention to detail is amazing, just little things here and there to make it easier. Everyone there told me I am seeing the best surgeon in Boston, the one they would see or send their family to. I am very lucky a friend pulled some strings to make that happen.
Now the not so good news: Their staff read the reports, slides and films differently. They came up with a 1.2 centimeter tumor which puts me in a more serious class; still low, just not as low. Because they know exactly how big the tumor is, they are more likely to remove the correct amount of tissue. If they do not remove a big enough area the first time then they will have to repeat the surgery. In 2 out 5 cases they have to do the surgery again.
The chance of chemo is still low. I am waiting for a date for surgery and then radiation (or chemo if needed) which will start a few weeks later. I should have surgery the week after next.
Christine
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I’m glad you got the second opinion. It sounds like you’re in good hands.
Stay strong.
Thank you for sending an update. Good luck tomorrow! My thoughts will be with you all day.
I admire your strength and send lots of love.
Follow the link below to read the next chapter in my personal journey…
- Surgery – July 3, 2009
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